some thoughts

This weekend I had the good fortune to spend lots of quality time with friends. Damon and I met up for dinner with my new friend Anne and her husband. It’s pretty marvelous that Anne and I met and have the same due days and we can run things by each other and truly empathize what the other is currently going through. I spent the day on Saturday inside reading, since it was a depressing, rainy day. I read Anne Lamott’s book, Operating Instructions, which is a great book about the first year of her son’s life. She is a great writer, and although she is pretty religious, she is also very politically liberal and a feminist and I love how real and honest she is as a writer. One minute she’s writing about the beauty and joy of being a mother and the next she is stating that her son is scum. It seems very refreshing and genuine to have someone tell it like it I imagine it is. There is one quote from her book, which I’m sure I’ll screw up, but it’s something like how becoming a mother opens and blossoms this whole part of your heart that you don’t even know you have. I think that is what I am looking forward to the most—loving and putting someone else before myself, always. Becoming a parent is truly a selfish and completely selfless thing, all at the same time.

I also met up with a bunch of other pregnant ladies for brunch on Sunday. It was great to hear perspectives and thoughts and it really made me realize what a shift is going to happen in our lives socially. It also made me realize that I have some amazing friends already. It’s a little strange, because Damon and I are the first ones in our close circle of friends to have a baby. Ever since we found out the pregnancy news, I have been very worried about things changing and friendships shifting and possibly ending. But man, I have some awesome friends. Although most of them (dare I say nearly all) are not in the same places in their lives as Damon and me (many don’t want kids; many are single; many aren’t ready), they are sincerely happy and excited for us, and go out of their way to show it. They aren’t feeling (or at least voicing to me) much anxiety about the change and I appreciate that they can look outside how this birth might personally affect them and see what it will be bringing us. They can see our joy and excitement around this birth and they support us completely. I feel so fortunate to have such a loving “village” of friends and family that is going to help us raise this child.

See, Angela, I can write some emotional stuff.